Me and 'im.

Suck Squeeze Bang Blow (or s2b2 for short) was formed in 2010 by Dr Daryl Octane and Rich Duisberg to blog and share our automotive high jinks. We don’t review cars, we’re more interested in the adventures you can have with them than their NCAP rating. You can find our work published in the motoring press or elsewhere in the media, 12 months from launch we reached 1 million hits on this site alone.

What they say about us :

“…you need to be careful when you write something like ‘It is illegal for Mums to cook on the barbeque.” – Someone at Penguin Books.

“Your driving is fine, your brain, however, is f*cked” – Porsche Silverstone Instructor

“I can’t help you. I’m in Mexico” – Mike Brewer, Wheeler Dealers.

“hilarious, absolutely love it” – Sales & Marketing Manager, Racelogic.

“I’ve never known anyone other than my Dad use the word onanist. Excellent.” – Editor, Practical Performance Car Magazine.

“Please accompany me to the Station, do not drive away, this is important.” – Gun toting French Policeman.

“I’m sorry but that is impossible.” – Nadège Basile, Press Attaché, Palais Princier de Monaco. (Monaco Royal Palace).

“More adventures than the Famous Five!” – Andrew Gresswell, professional Volvo killer.

“You are no longer welcome at this Hotel” – The Dorint, Brusselles, Belgium.

“You’re both really lovely people” – Charles Ridley, Director of some poncy design/media company down South somewhere.

“These two are to motoring what Hermann Goering’s passion for dancing was to the German war effort. I like it.” Dan – redub car parts

“Last time I visited your website I caught herpes, I’ll definitely be back.” – John Healy, Taxi Firm owner.

“lying in f*cking bed recovering from sh*tty pneumonia on a sunny day two days after my birthday is a f*cking drag but now you’ve asked for my thoughts on your site it gives me something to spleen about >snip< if i was your editor i'd really kick some ass" - Simon Heptinstall, reviewer of Travel Trousers from Wiltshire.

“Your bastard lovechild is now 3 years old. Call me” – Ben Wardle, Shark Performance.

“Absolutely fecking brilliant!” – (Possibly, but probably not, the) Barry Scott.

“Brilliant! It’s been a pleasure working with you (I bet you don’t hear that often)” – International digital marketing agency.

“A certain oblique appeal” – MD of Noble Automotive.

“I really liked the story” – Editor, MotorCycleNews

“i know you can do brilliant stuff” – Ex Editor, TopGear

“Nice read!” Editor, Octane Magazine.

“Brilliant article. Fantastic Photos.” – MD, Tipo250.

“Nice article. Nice pics too” – Paul Garlick of Pistonheads.

“Your posts fall foul of the rules [and have been deleted]” – Paul Garlick of Pistonheads again.

“Wo ist meine Meerschweinchen ?” – 54 year old Disc Jockey Timothy Westwood.

“I wanted to get in touch to let you know how much I’ve been enjoying S2B2. I’m very glad to see there are still people out there who love cars and retain a sense of humour…” – Content Director of a major US commercial broadcasting television network

“The work of Genius” – Gareth Jones on Speed.

“Just explained to 400 people at the ICC in Birmingham how technical and vigorous Morgan is now.This [Mog Musings spoof Newsletter] does not help at all :) ” – Charles Morgan, Morgan Motor Company.

“No!” – Mazda PR department.

“Big fan of the website and your trips!” – Evo Magazine

“good mix of fact and humour” – MD of Tipo250 (google ‘em).

“Proper Funny” – s2b2′s Lawyer.

“Still getting the grit out of my ears – but great fun” – MD of Tiger Racing.

“What you write influences what people think of our cars, and they’re not as bad as you say” – MG6 development Engineer.

“Such a novel proposal we had to get involved” – Editor of Banzai Magazine.

“A lead balloon” – PR Manager of Chrysler.

“Absolutely brilliant” – Evo blogs.

“Completely unsuitable” – Editor of What Car.

“Mental. We wouldn’t dream of doing this ourselves. Probably.” – Editor of Practical Performance Car Magazine.

“Properly fun” – TyreSmoke.

“F–k off and die” – Peugeot RCZ Owners cub.

“Fan-bloody-tastic” – Someone on Pistonheads.

“Always good to have a sense of humour” – Peugeot PR dept.

“I have been PMSL all morning at your articles. And I mean that in a good way!” – Editor of Classic, Performance & Retro Magazine.

“No, we can’t afford to buy Lotus, idiot.” – The current Mrs Duisberg.

“If Carlsberg Did Stag do’s.” – Matt someoneorother.

All text content, photographs, and the ’roundel’ logo are © s2b2 and must not be used, copied, buggered about with, or used as a masturbatory aid without our prior permission. Ta.